Now on Top Gear
[ horn toots rhythmically ]
It's all about Hollywood.
We choose our favorite cars from the movies and tv.
Oh, this is sacrilege.
"The Sopranos'" Steve Schirripa hits our track.
All right, here we go, baby.
And Tanner puts the new Subaru WRX to the test
by racing against a dirt bike.
Foust: Aah!
Sync and corrected by Bellows www.addic7ed.com
Hollywood -- where movie stars are born.
But actors aren't always the only stars.
Certain cars have been known to steal the scene.
So, we were each given $2,000
to buy and modify what we thought was the best car
to ever appear in a movie or tv show.
Does it get any cooler than KITT?
I mean, first off,
you've got a trans am with artificial intelligence.
It had a British voice for an American car, for some reason.
It could evade police. It had rockets.
It could go 300 miles an hour.
A Pontiac has never done that.
You've got "the hoff," members only jackets like these
I mean, it was everything great about the '80s.
Now, this one's a little updated.
It's a '95.
I got a new scanner on there.
I've got a new computer inside.
There's no other car these guys could choose
that could come anywhere close to this one.
[ Vehicle approaches ]
Great Scott!
What the hell is that?
[ Laughs ]
You're not serious.
Little help?
Your gull-wing door, I assume?
Yeah. Just hold on to that thing for --
I just got to get this in place here.
This seems like a terrible idea.
Got some kinks to work out of the system,
but, behold -- the time machine.
We're going back to the future, my friend.
This is your Delorean.
I mean, it's not exactly a Delorean,
but for 2 grand you can't get a real Delorean.
[ Laughing ] Don't be kidding.
Of all the cool cars you could have chosen---
Oh, come on.
What the hell have you done here?
What, are you making popcorn?
That is a Mr. Fusion,
which is something that is, you know, far ahead of its time.
You welded hinges to the roof,
and that's basically where your style ended.
Did you spend any time on this at all?
Foust: It's awesome.
I bet you're thinking twice
about whatever that thing is over there, huh?
- Is this the hoff-mobile? - Uh-huh.
Does this even count?
I mean, I've got a time machine,
and you've just got a talking car.
This thing will go 300 miles an hour.
Time machine.
What do you think Adam's driving at a slow rate of speed?
What's the oldest car you could possibly imagine?
Was there a car in "Ben-Hur"?
He'll get a chariot.
[ Vehicle approaches ]
What?
[ Laughs ]
Oh, this is sacrilege.
See?
[ Laughing ] You got to be kidding me.
[ Laughing ] Weld the door. [ Chuckles ]
You used a duster as a general Lee?
Yeah.
It's in the Mopar family.
[ Hand taps ]
I thought a Nissan into a Delorean was bad,
but this is criminal.
I can't believe you picked a show that we actually know.
This is an iconic car, my friends.
Tell me you didn't have a small general Lee.
- I did. I had several. - That's enough.
You aren't even in the right continent.
A Nissan?
- This is your time machine. Foust: - Yeah.
This isn't gonna make it till tomorrow.
And you -- this is a mess.
It's a rolling playpen.
Look at your dash.
Does your daughter know you have all her toys in your car?
That's a very sophisticated computer system.
Man: That was easy.
This is a real car that did real things.
These are toys.
Yeah? Eat my shorts.
- Shall we see what we're doing here? - Yeah.
"A true hero car does its own stunts.
"To test the talents of your cars,
"you'll compete in a series of challenges,
the first of which is 30 miles east of here."
- Let's hit it. - All right.
Hey, can you give me a hand?
Wood: Both of you have no doors.
Foust: Bring it down.
Okay.
Foust: I thought it would take me at least
until the first challenge
to prove how superior my Japanese Delorean was,
but straightaway it was making an impression.
[ Man speaks indistinctly ]
I just heard him say that this is Michael J. Fox
in "Back to the Future" right there.
Tanner, you made the Hollywood tour.
Check that one off the bucket list.
It was an unbelievably big moment for Delorean -- 1985,
when Marty McFly looked over to Doc Emmett Brown and said,
"you made a time machine--- out of a Delorean?"
And the word was immortalized.
Now, as nice as it would have been
to use a Delorean for this car,
I mean, for $2,000, obviously you just can't find one.
But the Nissan 200SX has rear-wheel drive.
It's got more of an edgy shape, like the Delorean had.
I was able to get a metallic-silver paint job
on the thing.
And it's cheap as hell.
Ferrara: This car is an icon -- the general Lee.
I mean, it's one of the most recognizable cars in history.
By 1981, the car was getting fan mail,
an average of 35,000 more letters
than any other human being on the show.
Now, the original general Lee was a '69 Dodge Charger.
This is a '73 Duster that's---
All right, it's crap because I couldn't find a '69 Charger
because the production probably used them all up.
They went through
anywhere between 250 and 300 Dodge Chargers
during the production of "The Dukes of Hazzard."
And the producers had spotter planes up
to fly over highways and look for dodge chargers,
to pull people over to see if they wanted to sell their cars.
And the modifications on the car were pretty simple --
just weld the door shut, paint it orange,
put "01" on the door, and a horn that blows "Dixie"---
[ Horn toots rhythmically ]
Which I couldn't afford.
So I got that off a lunch truck.
What's up, brother?
Man: Nice car.
Thank you so much, man.
I just got a tip from a homeless guy.
That is a new record right there.
We have hit a new low.
[ Laughs ]
Wood: Adam may have been a hit with the homeless,
but nothing could beat KITT
I'm telling you --
you got to try notching your steering wheel like this.
Now, I did use a speak-and-spell-type device
for my computing.
I'll be honest -- I didn't actually wire
all these switches.
I just glued them on.
But when you hit the "turbo" button, look out.
Man: That was easy. [ Engine revs ]
Ferrara: We blazed our way out of Hollywood
and arrived at our first challenge.
Need a hand?
No!
Forget it. I'm fine.
Stupid door. That was not a good idea.
What's up with the wall?
I got it right here. I don't know, but it cannot be good.
"To see which of your cars has the best performance,
"you must accelerate to 88 miles per hour,
"then come to a full stop
before hitting that wall of boxes."
Referencing the best movie ever.
"Because your car should be better than the average car,
the distance to beat has been set by a Suzuki SX4."
And I wonder where we got that from.
"Shortest distance from start to finish wins."
Fairly simple.
What happens if I, like, vanish?
That's cute.
Have either of those cars ever seen what 88 miles an hour looks like?
- Walk away.
Tell them to watch, 'cause I'll show you.
Go. Just go.
I hate it when he has horsepower.
- He's gonna smoke us. - Yeah, I know.
Okay, so, these boxes got to be
where the Suzuki came up to speed and stopped. Okay.
I got the radar gun to make sure he doesn't cheat.
- Got it. - Think he's ready?
This isn't even a challenge.
It's another way for me to show off
how awesome the KITT Car is.
All right, we have the radar gun here.
We'll let you know when you're up to 88 miles an hour,
and that's when you brake.
Whatever you do, do not hit that wall.
Wood: 10-4, buddy.
All right, rut, go!
Boy: We can begin learning together.
Ready, KITT? Go.
[ Tires screech ]
20, 30, 40, 50.
60? That's too fast.
- Go ahead. - 70. You ready on the radio?
Yeah, I'm ready.
[ Toy speaking indistinctly ]
88.
All right, brake!
The answer is---
[ Tires screech ]
Man: That was easy.
What?
Come on.
Yes!
Can you guys even see me?!
We can't hear you! Sorry!
No, don't talk to him.
Wood: My Trans AM did great.
Marty McFoust was up next.
No way I'm hitting 88 miles an hour.
I'm just gonna tell you right now.
Would you stop that?
Gentlemen, the time machine is ready.
Okay, we'll tell you when you're doing 88. Go.
[ Tires screech ]
Come on. There's 45.
- 50. - 50.
60.
You're at 60.
[ Laughing ] 65. Come on.
Come on!
There's 70!
Come on!
77.
77!
No-o-o-o-o!
[ Wood laughs ]
[ Both laugh ]
[ Chuckles ]
[ Tires screech ]
Perfect!
You sure I didn't make 88?
77.
But you broke 88 boxes.
Does that make you feel better?
Look, he's dragging.
Wood: Coming up, the general Lee gets its turn---
[ Coughs ]
---And Tanner takes on a dirt bike
in the ultimate off-road challenge.
Wow, he's really fast over the rough stuff!
Wood: We were competing to see who had the best Hollywood car
$2,000 could buy.
[ Tires screech ]
Our first challenge was a braking test.
We had to accelerate to 88 miles per hour,
then come to a complete stop before hitting a wall of boxes.
KITT and I had no problem.
But Tanner's tin-foil time machine
never made it up to speed.
[ Both laugh ]
Adam was up next.
Ferrara: I was beginning to second-guess my decision
to replace a charger with a duster.
I don't know what good this is gonna do, but I'll put it on.
Adam, are you ready?
Almost.
Just remember that, thus far, my car
is the only one better than a Suzuki.
Okay.
He's a [Bleep] annoying man.
Adam, are you ready?
I'll let you know when I'm ready.
How's that?
Play with your gun.
You remember the time that we did this and I beat you?
I don't think this car's gonna get up to 88 miles an hour,
to be honest with you.
I'm gonna have to start further back---
like Mexico.
And the brakes have been going, so let's see how this turns out.
Okay, hit it in three, two --
your car's gonna suck -- go.
[ Horn toots rhythmically ]
[ Chuckles ]
You got to -- you have to use the gun.
This is -- really?
You feel like it's a waste of battery.
I feel like it's a waste of batteries.
Just for -- just---
How fast am I going?
18.
My speedometer doesn't work!
Tell him 30.
20.
90?
I say he doesn't break 60.
Come on.
How fast is that?
Oh [Bleep]
No brakes. [ Tires screech ]
There's some. Not enough.
Oh!
[ Laughing ] He's off in the bushes!
[ Both laugh ]
Wow.
He may be unconscious.
That was a violent boom.
See if you can get him on the radio.
Are you okay?
[ Laughs ]
Are you okay?
Yeah. How fast was that?
73.
Damn it.
Wood: So, let's see.
- You did 73 miles an hour. - Yeah.
- You did 77. - Right.
And I did more than 88,
which makes KITT and I the winners.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
- Why do you do this? - Feeling it.
Isn't that what you do when you win stuff?
I don't know. [ Laughs ]
He's such a good winner.
Yeah. Isn't he? Let's go kick him again.
[ Cheers and applause ]
And now on to something
that doesn't look anything like a hero car,
but it's supposed to perform like one.
So, basically the exact opposite of our movie cars.
Exactly.
This is the 2011 Subaru STI.
It's the fastest Subaru ever built,
and it's supposed to be fast on any surface you throw at it.
Well, is it?
I took it to a ghost town
deep in the mountains to find out.
Foust: When most people think of an off-road vehicle,
they think of a truck or an SUV.
But Subaru thinks of this.
The 2011 Impreza WRX STI.
[ Laughs ]
It's all-wheel drive,
turbo-charged,
and grips like a squirrel on amphetamines.
Yeah, there's definitely no doubt --
this car is a blast to drive.
It's not a supercar, but it is fast.
For 35 grand, it's unbelievably fast.
140 miles per hour on a "B" road --
bumpy, narrow, uneven pavement.
It's incredibly calm, cool, and collected.
The STI is the top of Subaru's performance line.
It comes with a 2 1/2-liter, 305-horsepower engine.
And for about 35 grand, you'll get an all-wheel drive car
that'll do zero to 60 in under 5 seconds.
It's not great on road,
and the stiffer suspension does help with that,
but once this car gets off road and gets into the tricky stuff,
it comes alive.
[ Tires screech ]
You can't tell how good these cars are
until you get them off road
and push them beyond your own comfort.
[ Tires screech ]
The grip the all-wheel drive system makes is violent.
You get all four wheels spinning in the same direction.
It's incredible, the reaction this car makes.
Subaru owners are unique yet predictable.
I could pretty much predict
that your IT Guy drives a WRX or an STI
and he honks and waves
at other Subaru WRXes and STIs on the road.
The Impreza STI
obviously has incredible off-road capabilities,
but to really find out how good it was,
I wanted to put it to a test.
Subaru claimed that this car drives like a sports car
over virtually any terrain.
But to see how fast this car goes over this terrain,
we need a benchmark to race against it.
That benchmark is the dirt bike,
perhaps the ultimate all-terrain vehicle.
And the only person we could find crazy enough
to take on this challenge
was "x" games gold medalist Cam Sinclair,
riding a Yamaha YZ250.
Now that I had my challenger, we needed a location.
This is Eagle Mountain,
once the largest open-pit iron mine
in the Western United States.
The iron ore from here was manufactured into steel
that was then used into making hardware
for World War II the Korean War, and Vietnam.
So, if you served your country,
chances are your tank came from here.
This 10,000-acre playground
was the perfect place for an all-terrain race.
Our course would take us from the top of the mine,
through a decrepit industrial area,
and finish just past a ghost town.
Racing across an industrial mine is pretty dangerous.
So the attorneys made me drive the rally version
of the STI for safety.
But even though it's been modified for racing,
it's not that different from a street car.
The engine has slightly more horsepower,
and it's equipped with a roll cage, better suspension,
and gravel tires.
[ Engine turns over ]
My number-one priority is to beat him. [ Engine revs ]
Number two is to try to keep my tongue in my mouth.
I had a higher top speed than my opponent,
but that didn't mean I had the advantage.
I'd have to use the ribbon of road winding through the mine,
while the dirt bike could cut straight through the obstacles
and race directly towards the finish.
To be completely honest, my money wasn't on the Subaru.
Man: Three---
Two---
One.
Go!
Foust: He got a jump start!
Oh, man, he's fast off the line!
The dirt bike immediately took advantage
of its ability to cut across the roads,
while all I could do was hammer down.
Oh, he's taking a shortcut!
Oh, no!
Wow, he's really fast over the rough stuff!
Oh, he's taking another shortcut.
Oh, man!
We'd split halfway down the Mountain.
I had 5 miles of windy dirt trails in front of me
before I'd reached the bottom.
Cam took a more direct approach.
[ Engine revs ]
There was a 50-degree slope
into a 1/4-mile-deep pit---
---Life-threatening to climb down---
---But on a bike---
---Suicidal.
But Cam was here to win.
With all this straightaway,
there's no way he's anywhere close.
Yeah! Oh [Bleep] There he is!
Cam's death-defying decision
to bomb down the side of a cliff paid off.
We were now in the apocalyptic industrial area.
With 3 miles to go,
it would be about maneuverability, not speed.
The dirt bike had the advantage in these close quarters,
and I was falling behind.
And even worse, my tongue was hanging out.
He just gets through the buildings so fast.
It's unbelievable.
We were almost out of the industrial zone
when I saw an opportunity to do something I couldn't resist.
Aah!
Taking that jump may have put me behind,
but I was hoping I could make it up once we hit the asphalt.
The challenge for us both
was to find the exit on the other side.
Whoa, wrong turn.
And I immediately took a turn into a dead end.
Oh, my gosh. That was close.
He could weave through the houses.
But so could I.
The Impreza was more than living up to its reputation
as an all-terrain car.
But then cam decided to put me in my place.
We were both lost in the labyrinth,
and the first to find the exit would take the race.
How do you get out of this place?
Cam had spotted the exit and hit the highway.
Unless I found a shortcut, it was all over.
There's the exit right there.
[ Choir vocalizing ]
Yes!
Come on!
Oh, my gosh. It's neck and neck.
Time for those 305 horses to do their job.
Hey!
Whew! Yeah!
Wood: Coming up, we continue our Hollywood-car challenge---
[ Tires screech ]
You lost your stick!
Schirripa: All right, here we go, baby.
---And one of the Sopranos hits our track.
I would make a good cab driver in New York, huh?
Okay, so, you raced a biker
through a ghost town, and you won.
How was it?
It was pretty awesome.
I got to say, this is probably better off road
than it is on road.
Really? Well, last year you took the mitsubishi Evo
down a ski slope covered in snow,
racing against two skiers.
So, I want to know -- how did the Subaru compare,
since that's the main competitor?
Like, the Subaru was perfect going up those gravel roads.
It's probably more fun on the dirt than the Evo,
or the Evo's probably more fun on the pavement.
But I didn't know which one was faster.
To find out, though, we elicited the help
of our infallible test driver, the Stig.
Foust: Stig getting comfortable.
[ Tires screech ] He's off.
The launch of these Subarus -- really incredible,
very popular among younger drivers
as drag cars for that reason.
Getting up to speed very quickly into the first corner,
seeming very composed,
heading actually into the Chicane
with very little body roll.
I can say, behind the wheel, it feels like this car's leaning
quite a bit more than it looks from the outside.
Stig finding his way into the teardrop --
now, this is where the all-wheel drive
will really set the STI apart
from our two-wheel-drive cars on this track,
as it can put the power down so efficiently
out of this tighter corner.
And sure enough, not a hint of wheel spin,
just putting every horsepower straight to the ground,
building up very impressive speed.
Blazing by the grass, not afraid to go off road,
tearing by the tires -- very quick through here.
Now, this is a difficult section of the track --
very bumpy and high speed.
Sti just nailing it through there --
that's what this car is good at -- the rough stuff.
Stig working just a little bit there
as he finds the apex with a hint of understeer.
Now we come into the S-turn section.
Now, quite a bit of weight on the front tires of this car
makes it under steer a little bit through these corners.
Somehow managing to get through the last corner
even with a drift, and across the line.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Wow.
Now, that was abusive.
It really was.
I mean, he got everything possible out of this car.
There's no doubt of that.
But the question is, is it faster than the Evo?
What do you guys think? I think it is.
[ Cheers and applause ] Yeah?
Yeah, you would be wrong.
It's actually 0.8 of a second slower than the Evo,
with a 1:30.0.
- Still a good lap, I would say. - Yeah.
Still ties with an X6 M -- much more expensive car.
We just have a fast board, that's all.
I mean, it shows why those cars are paired up so closely.
It's kind of like the Chevy-Ford battle,
but of Japanese rally cars.
Yes, but it's kind of the modern-day muscle-car battle.
They're both about the same price, same horsepower.
This is an incredibly capable car.
It's just not as good as the Evo on our road course.
Oh, you mean kind of like how your Nissan Delorean
is nowhere near as good as my KITT Car
in our movie-cars challenge.
Wood: We each spent $2,000 to create our favorite cars
to ever star in a tv show or movie.
Now we were trying to find out who had chosen the best
and met up for our next challenge.
Wood: You know what I've always wanted to try?
That show "Rockford Files"?
That guy would always -- you know, he would reverse
and then spin around and take off.
A Rockford.
- Is that what they call it? - Yeah.
- You can do that? - Reverse-spin turn, yeah.
I think you could do it with almost any car.
You go first. We'll try it after you.
Really? You're gonna do it if I do it?
- Oh, yeah, sure. - Done.
Foust: All right, so,
basically I want to get up to speed,
crank the wheel one rotation, lift off the gas.
When it gets halfway around, hit the brake,
get the steering wheel straight, put it in a forward gear,
and drive away, okay?
Simple as that.
I can't wait to see this.
You think his door's gonna fly open?
Oh, totally. [ Chuckles ]
Like a little bird.
I think he's gonna lose the entire air-conditioning system.
Okay, here we go, full throttle.
Got to get up -- Oh, it's not fast.
There's that.
[ Tires screech ]
[ Hands clapping ]
There went his prop rod for the door.
That was so scary.
That was nuts, huh?
You forgot your door post.
The door threw me off.
I felt like everything was gonna come out the door.
Well, you stayed in.
- Was that movie magic? - Mnh.
Ferrara: Tanner made it look easy
because he's a professional stunt driver.
My general Lee was up next.
I'll be honest with you -- I am not worried
about my door flying open because I welded it shut.
I am worried, however, of the front end falling off,
having enough power,
turning, braking, and stopping.
- Do you think he's gonna do okay? - No.
- Slow-steering rack, so he can't get it around. - Sure.
And then when it does come around,
he's not gonna turn enough,
so he's gonna end up backing up into us, okay?
Can you run in those shoes?
All right.
[ Laughs ]
Huh?!
- Impressive. - Uh-huh.
- Impressive. - Pretty nice, huh?
I don't know what to say.
It was so ugly and so slow.
Wood: Adam tried, but his Rockford turn wasn't a success.
This is gonna work.
KITT and I attempt the rockford turn.
Hauling ass, hauling ass, hauling ass, hauling ass.
And Steve Schirripa---
Schirripa: All right, here we go, baby.
---Tries something he's never done before.
Like a jockey -- "come on!"
We have been given each 2,000$
to re-create our favorite cars from Hollywood.
My "Knight Rider" knock-off won the braking challenge.
- What? - Yes!
Tanner's "Back to the Future" copy
had completed the Rockford turn---
and Adam's "Dukes of Hazzard" stand-in
failed miserably at both.
Oh [Bleep]
[ Both laugh ]
KITT had a chance to make it 2-2
as we lined up for a try at the rockford turn.
Wood: All right, I'm gonna try the rockford.
I've got the fastest car here. This is gonna work.
Come on, you big hick.
Let's go!
Here he comes.
All right. All right.
Hauling ass, hauling ass, hauling ass, hauling ass.
Whoa-ho-ho!
Oh, it worked!
It worked!
Whoo!
Holy [Bleep] That's scary.
Girl: ---To take a nap.
I am the greatest driver of all time.
Foust: Rutledge may have thought he pulled off the stunt,
but he went into the dirt and lost forward momentum,
making me the winner.
It was a little off-road, though.
- What happened to the -- - Yeah.
Are you kidding me?
This meant he and I
were tied going into our last challenge.
Now it's time for what we call "Big star, small car."
That's where we take a celebrity,
put him in our Suzuki, let him go around the track
to see who can set the fastest lap time.
And I am very pleased today
because our celebrity is a good friend of mine.
You know him from "The Sopranos" --
- Steve Schirripa. - Hey, buddy.
[ Cheers and applause ] Good to see you, pal.
Thanks for being here.
All right.
So, how do you feel? You ready for this?
I'm a little concerned, a little concerned.
When was the last time you drove?
The last time I drove was about eight months ago.
- Eight months ago? - Eight months.
- You should be fine. - Yeah.
[ Laughter ]
Let's go!
[ Cheers and applause ]
I am an absolute wreck.
I should have wore a depends.
I'm not joking.
Ferrara: Okay, we have to get some seat covers
for the Suzuki.
All right, here we go, baby.
All right, he's off.
I can't come in last. I just can't.
Oh, boy.
Okay, he's heading towards the first turn.
And the Suzuki's a snug fit.
All right, come on. Come on.
Easy on that corner, baby, easy on that corner.
I would make a good cab driver in New York, huh?
Yeah, if you weren't in a hurry.
I really and truly am trying my best here.
God!
[ Gears grind ]
Grinding those gears, man.
I'm glad I don't own this car.
Like a jockey -- "come on!"
Hit the white line! Hit the white line!
Hit the [Bleep] white line!
There's the tires.
When you're driving a car for, you know, 45 years
and you still suck at it, there's a problem.
Okay, going into cameraman's curve --
it's very dangerous, and---
no one is concerned.
Come on, baby! Get on your horse!
Come on, Suzuki!
Here comes the jockey across the line!
All right. All right.
We'll see what happens.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Steve, come on up.
Steve Schirripa!
[ Cheers and applause continue ]
- Hi, brother. - Good to see you, baby.
[ Laughs ] This is wild in here.
Have a seat, my friend.
Ohh!
Now, did you have fun on your lap?
I had fun.
I was extremely, extremely scared.
[ Laughter ]
First of all, I haven't driven a car in eight months.
- I live in Manhattan. I don't have a car, you know. - Right.
- And I wasn't even a good driver when I did drive, and -- - Right.
And then you had to drive a shift.
I've never even attempted to drive a shift.
So, the Stig actually taught you how to drive?
Stig is like my dad.
[ Laughter ]
I consider Stig like my adopted dad now.
- You do? - I really do.
Do you drive -- you have to drive when you're out here.
No, I don't drive.
How do you get around?
Well, they drive me around.
[ Laughter ] I'm -- I've done okay, you know?
I don't mean like that. Stop it.
- Let's back up. - I'm working usually.
- When I come to LA., I'm working. - All right.
What was the car like your family had, growing up?
We didn't own a car.
It was all subways, buses?
Yeah. You want to know why I suck.
That's why I suck. [ Laughter ]
You had a pretty cool car, though.
You had a Javelin.
A '69 Javelin was the first car that I owned.
And who did you get to drive you in that?
- I drove. - You drove.
- Adam, at one time in my life, I had to drive. - Okay.
So, the Javelin was a very cool car.
- Now, was that the car you learned to drive in? - No, no, no.
- Believe it or not, Driver's Ed, Brooklyn, New York. - It was school, yeah.
You pay the teacher $200,
you don't have to go to the class.
[ Laughter ]
Then I was moving to Las Vegas from New York,
- so I had to get a car. - Right.
I met you when you were in Vegas.
- Yeah. I lived in Vegas for over 20 years. - Right.
You were a maitre D'?
Maitre D'. Paul Anka used to own a nightclub.
You were known as the "make out Maitre D'."
[ Laughter ] He was. That's --
No, listen. This is what would happen.
A guy comes in, like a customer --
say, you, all right?
- You say, "Steve, listen, I got a girl over here." - Mm-hmm.
"I got nowhere to go."
Whatever you're gonna do with her, that's your business.
- Classy fella. - Yeah.
Maybe the guy slipped me $20.
- Maybe he slipped me $50. - Right.
I would tell the valet Parker,
"bring a nice car around for Adam."
I don't know whose car it was.
Right. [ Laughter ]
And you and the girl
would go in the parking lot in the back seat and just --
you know, if the guy came out, wants his car,
you know, we would obviously stall it.
You know what I mean? "Hurry up!"
There you go. [ Laughter ]
So, there was some of that going on.
- Pretty funny. - That's funny.
It's hysterical, unless it's your car.
[ Laughter ] The guy comes, picks up his --
- but he never knew. - What do you mean, "he never knew"?
The wife gets in the car in the morning
and goes [Sniffs] "It smells like---"
[ Laughter ]
"Where the hell were you last night?"
"I swear to God I was at Paul Anka's club.
I was by myself."
So, you weren't the valet guy.
- You didn't park the cars. - No, no.
Park the cars -- what, are you kidding me?
I'm lucky I got myself to work.
All right, well, let's see how good you are.
Where do you think you're gonna end up?
- I'm gonna say that I beat Buzz Aldrin. - Okay.
I'm gonna go low. I'm gonna --
Okay. I'm gonna hold --
well, look -- I will tell you this --
you did it in 1:55.02---
Ah. [ Cheers and applause ]
..Which means you --
[ shouts indistinctly ]
Let me show you where you are, man.
Let me show you where you are.
1:55.02.
You tied Michelle Rodriguez,
who was in "The Fast and the Furious."
All right. That's not bad.
I've never had this opportunity before.
Do you want to be on top or on the bottom
of Michelle Rodriguez? [ Laughter ]
I'll go on top.
[ Laughter ]
All right, all right, I'm not --
I am proud of that. You should be.
- I am proud of that. - He learned to drive a stick this morning.
All right? I'm proud of that.
[ Cheers and applause ]
That's a good job. That's a great job.
So, now let me ask you this --
what's your favorite car you've ever seen in a movie or tv?
- "My mother the car." - "My mother the car"?
- You ever see that car? - Black and white?
The car talked. The mother was in the car.
Got reincarnated as the car.
"My mother the car" -- anybody remember that? [ Cheers and applause ]
Steve Schirripa.
And he learned to drive a stick this morning.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Not bad.
That's a great job, my man.
Thanks, man.
Wood: Coming up, our Hollywood cars
are put to the ultimate test when they face the challenge
of outrunning the baddest guy we know. Foust: Aah!
Ferrara: We were competing
to see who had the best $2,000 car.
Oh [Bleep]
[ Both laugh ]
Rut's really bad "Knight Rider"
won the braking test,
and Tanner won the Rockford turn.
So they were tied.
My general Lee had not been performing very well,
but if I could win the last challenge,
it would be a three-way tie.
"One of the classic skills of a hero car
"is the ability to outrun the bad guys.
"To find out which of you chose the best getaway car,
"you'll now try to evade a typical villain's car.
"The villain will pursue your car around this track.
"To catch you, he'll need to pass your car with his.
Be sure to avoid the movie-prop obstacles in your path."
Where's the villain? [ Tires screeching ]
Of course the Stig is here.
"You have a 15-second head start.
The car that avoids capture the longest wins."
So, you go first.
You ready there, Stig?
All right.
[ Engine revving ]
Oh, man, those guys know that this car is not fast.
Problem is, the car's just remarkably heavy
for how much power it has -- 160 horsepower,
and it weighs 3,000 pounds.
It's ridiculous.
All right, Tanner. You ready?
Wood: Here we go.
Three, two, one---
Go!
Go, baby! Go, baby! Go!
That's really full-throttle. That's sad that's it.
Look at it. Wheels.
Look at that.
He is rarin' to go.
There we go.
[ Tires screech ]
[ Laughing ] Look at the damn door.
Oh, man, we're flat-trucking it a little bit.
There he is! Oh, no!
Aah!
Whoa!
[ Both laugh ]
Through the barrier!
Little crash there! It's okay!
[ Tires screech ]
Come on---
Stig is definitely getting closer.
Look at that.
[ Tires screech ] Here it comes.
He's gonna catch him now.
[ Tires screech ]
Okay, he's got me. He's got me.
He's got me.
He's there. How long?
3:05.
I'd say I lasted pretty long there.
I'm kind of surprised, to be honest with you.
Tanner's time was just over 3:00.
I was up next, and if I won this challenge,
it would be a three-way tie.
Ferrara: Okay.
Half a seat belt, six cylinders,
limited braking, terrible handling,
and I'm being chased by the Stig.
This isn't good.
You ready for this?
Okay.
Three, two, one, go!
That was not very exciting.
Does he know this is a race?
Come on. Come on, come on. Oh, there you go, baby.
[ Chuckling ] That thing looks like kind of classic.
Here comes the Stig.
Hold on. That's it.
Shift when you have to. Shift when you have to.
Don't stall. Don't stall. Don't stall.
[ Tires screech ]
What's he doing?
Don't stall.
Don't -- oh, you can't stall now.
Whoa! That's not good.
Hey, stop the clock. Stop the clock. That's it.
My duster may have looked the part,
but it just didn't have the speed.
The general Lee was done.
1:19.
Oh, that's depressing.
Wood: The pressure was on.
If I was gonna beat Tanner,
I'd have to keep the Stig at bay for longer than 3:05.
Me and KITT were ready.
- I know that he's got a car that sounds fast. - Yeah.
Is it quick?
He's got a button he thinks that makes it quick.
David Hasselhoff, I need you.
I need you right now.
Three, two, one, go!
Yeah, there it is.
Oh, I'm missing part of the steering wheel.
That is not gonna be very helpful.
Stig is on it.
[ Tires screech ]
I really need that other part of the steering wheel.
Rutledge is almost on the wall.
Oh, Stig is working for it.
Oh! Oh!
I'm almost sliding!
Oh, no!
- He just passed you 1:19, 1:20. - Damn.
Of course he's passed me. There's no fruit to hit.
[ Chuckling ] Oh, my arms are crossed over.
This "cutting the steering wheel" thing was a bad idea.
Come on, Stig!
Oh, he's got him.
Oh [Bleep]
[ Laughs ]
2:56, 2:57.
[ Tires screeching ]
Oh, man!
Why did I cut this steering wheel?
Ugh!
[ Car beeping ]
Oh, that --
- Did you hit your little "turbo" button? - I tried.
The problem is I kept reaching for the steering wheel,
and I had cut a little too much of it.
[ Chuckles ]
How'd I do?
You beat me. You did.
Okay. Thank you.
You beat me. And---
Did I beat you?
No, no. See -- Did I beat you?
You throttled him! [ Laughing ] What?
What was the time?
Tell me the time that I got.
3:34. Ooh.
This is awesome! I knew I'd beat you guys!
Oh, this is what this feels like.
Oh!
I beat you!
Sorry. I beat you.
I beat you more, though!
This is awesome.
Your halter top is coming up.
This jacket was the best idea I've ever had.
Should we just leave him here, basking?
Let him bask.
You bask. We'll leave.
Winner.
That just happened!
Don't turn around. Don't turn around.
Yeah, that just happened! Just keep walking.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Stop it. Yes.
Just stop it.
I love the gloating. It fits a grown man.
It's great. Thank you.
Look, I'm sorry.
I don't get the opportunity
to beat you guys at stuff that often.
It just felt so good.
Okay, but it's a budget win
I could have got a real charger, and I would have beat you.
A budget win?
If I had a real Delorean, I would have gone---Slower.
Yes. [ Laughter ]
I mean, the whole challenge here
was to buy the best movie car you could for 2 grand.
The KITT was it. I win.
See you next time on Top Gear.
Sync and corrected by Bellows www.addic7ed.com